So this isn't a big thing at all, just something that's been kinda bugging me lately. As you guys know Ryn and My fast is happening in different stages of severity- This week has been the food fast until 5, and a semi tech fast: We are allowing community style games, like me playing online with my friends, or if Ryn and I wanted to play a video game together, but all single player games are out. Next week the food fast is going to last all day and I will hopefully not even turn on my computer all week for any reason.
What's bugging me is I am handling the tech fast stuff fairly well, all websites I usually spend hours on, the social media, the lack of video games, I'm not really feeling the loss. As a result I feel like I'm not doing enough, like im cheating somehow, or I didn't pick a hard enough fast. I dunno. I just feel like I should be doing more.
Now, is this just me being crazy, or is it God convicting me? or maybe a spiritual attack, making me feel bad even though I am sacrificing this stuff? I don't know how to handle this feeling I have. What do you guys think?
-Kevin
Matt said in an email regarding the fast “As a local body, we want to choose to fast from any activity that might get in the way of our spending quality time with God in prayer, worship and solitude.” So are you using your time gained by the fast as intended? It might not be hard but are you gaining something spiritually? Maybe you are comparing your fast to your friends or others at Netcast. Maybe even subconsciously. And I would say that probably isn’t a good idea. I could have decided to give up food, to juice or eat only fruit or nuts, but I know I would be doing it as an excuse to lose a few pounds. I am sacrificing less than if I was starving myself for 21 days, but gaining a ton, spending time reading and talking to Jesus, understanding my faith more and more everyday. Had I given up food I would be suffering with a migraine due to lack of nutrients and calories, and I’m not sure where that would leave my kids and I am sure Jesus wouldn’t pat me on the back for such a choice.
ReplyDeleteI would just be intentional about your time. Use it well.